Secrets about Christian men and immodesty


by Richard Mansel

Women’s magazines make a living off of disclosing secrets about women and men. Today, another secret will be revealed that may open the eyes of many Christian women and help arm them with knowledge and empathy.

The refrain we often hear from Christian women who dress immodestly is that men aren’t supposed to be looking anyway because of their commitment to God. This logic is dangerously¬†naive.

When a man becomes a Christian he does not cease to be a man with all the passions and sexual drive God gave him. The desire to look at attractive women is still instilled deep in his being and that will not go away when he exits the baptistery. This makes him a male, not a pervert.

The secret that needs to be revealed, to help Christian women, can also help the guilt of Christian men giving them the power to grow in these matters.

Ladies, Christian men have a love/hate relationship with immodesty.

As fleshly men with inherent passions, they desire women sexually and love attractive, immodest women because sex is on their minds all the time.

In our sex-saturated society, men deserve a respite from immodesty when they are among their sisters in Christ. When women in the kingdom are also immodest, men can’t get away from it. It would be like a woman on a strict diet being surrounded by chocolate every where she went.

While men crave beautiful women, Christian men also hate immodesty because it threatens them spiritually. They know lust is sinful (Matthew 5:27-28; Job 31:1) and they wish all women would dress modestly while desiring otherwise. The conflict can be intense.

Christian women often do not know the battles that men face. The fleshly and the spiritual are in constant warfare for dominance in their hearts. Fleshly men just surrender and indulge whenever possible. Yet, Christian men must keep fighting the dragon. They don’t win all the battles, either, and the wounds can be painful.

When will Christian women understand and empathize? When will they start helping men in their struggles? When will they stop fighting against the hearts of godly men?

Do Christian women love Christian men? If so, please express that love by being modest. The enemy is Satan and if we can help each other go to heaven, it will all be worth it.

8 thoughts on “Secrets about Christian men and immodesty

  1. Good points, Richard!

    May I offer a paraphrase is the same vein?

    When a man becomes a doctor he does not cease to be a man with all the passions and sexual drive God gave him. The desire to look at attractive women is still instilled deep in his being and that will not go away when he graduates medical school. This makes him a male, not a pervert.

    Yet many, many Christian women continue to expose themselves to male doctors.

  2. Great points!

    Well worded and easily readable.

    It doesn’t matter what vocation a man enters. When Christianity is “received” or “embraced” he does not cease to be a man. The level of “temptation” in any chosen profession needs to be examined very carefully, and if too much for him, a change of vocation may be warranted. Matthew 7:13-14.

    Men and women think differently. They always will. That’s probably why they love one another in many significant ways. John 13:34-35.

  3. Great article. Succinct and accurate. As for the questions at the end, I believe it’s a matter of so not understanding the natural drive with which the LORD Himself created us that many women tend to look down on us with disgust in this area. As many of us know, in matters of sensuality, men tend to be visually stimulated while women tend to be emotionally stimulated. Very different indeed. We all need to strive to understand each other or things will never change. (After all, I don’t know a single woman who likes feeling looked down on by a man because “she’s so emotional.” ūüôā )

    And let me just add that tight, or “snug,” can be just as deadly as low-/high-cut.

  4. In response to visiting the doctor…it is very difficult, but I have always gone way out of my way to have only female physicians. I have my babies at home, and even in an emergency situation, demanded a female physician come to do my surgery, etc. It takes a lot of extra time and effort, and raises a lot of ire in doctors, but I don’t care. I strongly believe that a man is a man, whether he has a white coat and a “Dr.” in front of his name, or not, and no one can tell me otherwise, though they have tried. I may not always have the presence of mind to choose, but as long as it depends on me, I belong only to my husband. It’s strange to me that women who are otherwise sensitive about modesty in dress, will still visit male physicians.

  5. Great article. One point of slight contention: Sex is not always on a man’s mind but it is not far from it. As a Christian, I have found myself wondering why Christian parents let/allow their children to wear worldly clothing. Why do my Christian sisters set store by the standards of the world? Exactly whose side are they on? Remember, Paul said: “And such were some of you: but ye are washed, but ye are sanctified, but ye are justified in the name of the Lord Jesus, and by the Spirit of our God.” (I Corinthians 6:11) We can not continue in the world, doing the deeds of the world, dressing the way of the world, and speaking the words of the world any longer once we become Christians. John 17:14-16; I Timothy 2:9-10

  6. In response to visiting the doctor. Who were the doctors under the Old Testament? If a man or woman had something on their bodies that they thought was leprosy didn’t God say go to the priest for examination?

  7. Another thought for the women – you are seen daily by men who are not saved and who make no attempt to avoid lust. Exposing yourself to the unsaved is hardly glorifying to God, and not conducive to witnessing about Jesus.

    If the average woman, Christian or not, could see herself as the average male sees her, I think virtually every woman would throw out a lot of her clothes and wear many of the rest differently.Very few women, even among those who don’t know Jesus, would want to be seen and thought of as their clothing invites some men to see and think of them.

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