Joseph recognized his brothers, although not having seen them for twenty-two years, but they did not recognize him, because he was 17 years old when they saw him last, and here he was 39 and dressed and speaking as an Egyptian.
He treated them roughly initially, insisting that they were spies,
“But he said to them, ‘No, but you have come to see the nakedness of the land.’ And they said, ‘Your servants are twelve brothers, the sons of one man in the land of Canaan; and in fact, the youngest is with our father today, and one is no more.’ But Joseph said to them, ‘It is as I spoke to you, saying, “You are spies!”’” (Genesis 42:12-14).
He was testing them, and they were passing the test, although he wanted to do more testing.
They had truly changed, and so they insisted on not being spies, but they were simply family.
When someone insists that you are something other than what you are, do what the brothers did and maintain your position.