Dying on a Molehill

“I plead with Euodia and I plead with Syntyche to agree with each other in the Lord” (Philippians 4:2).
Sometimes in a relationship it’s a good idea to ask if this is an issue that really matters. There was once a marine master sergeant who would ask: “Is this the hill you wish to die on?” There are times when a parent will have to put his foot down with a teenager. There are times when a spouse will have to talk about a hurtful thing the other did. But for the most part, these are issues where one demonstrates a great failure to trust the other. When church members or married partners’ discussion is constantly about minor matters, things that won’t make a bit of difference in eternity, then perhaps this is not the hill to die on!
Signs of this are when one parent is given a long list of the “proper” way (that would be my way, naturally) to do a thing while the other is away, or the demand to know what the other is doing, minute by minute while the other is away.
If the other person got the job done (even if it wasn’t your way), wasn’t that the point of the exercise in the first place?
Reasonable check-ins are one thing, but essentially micro managing the other person is an effort to control them. If you married an adult, then he (or she) does not need to be controlled. If you want your teenager to become an adult, you will have to allow him some discretion, so he will be able to learn how to do things independently, to mature. You don’t have the right to control anybody.
If you must exercise controlling behavior, may I suggest controlling yourself?

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